Mary Hayden, a beautiful, warm, and generous soul, peacefully left us on Sept. 17, at Stamford Hospital with her daughters by her side.
Mary lived a life of service – to the thousands of patients she cared for as a nurse for more than 40 years, and to the friends and family whom she loved and supported throughout her 88 years on this Earth.
Mary Elizabeth White was born in New London, Connecticut, on Feb. 4, 1936, to Johanna Donnelly from the tiny village of Caherdaniel, County Kerry, Ireland and Theodore Daniel White from Nova Scotia. She was raised across the river in Groton with her younger brother Billy, who had physical and mental challenges. At a very young age, Mary became a big part of his caregiving.
Mary attended Robert E. Fitch High School in Groton, graduating in 1954. While there, she was a standout basketball player, singer, and artist. After high school, she matriculated to Saint Francis Hospital School of Nursing in Hartford. She began her nursing career working at local hospitals, the Naval Underwater Sound Laboratory, and the U.S. Submarine Base in Groton. This led to a position working as a civilian nurse in the U.S. Navy, which brought her to many ports of call throughout the U.S. and Europe.
She proudly proclaimed that she learned how to drive in 14 different countries. She particularly cherished her five-year stint at the Naval Air Station Sigonella near Catania, Sicily. She was charmed by the Sicilian locals, who would address her as “Principessa.”
In 1960, Mary became briefly married to Edwin Hille, with whom she had two daughters, Jeannie and Leigh.
In 1975, Mary married George Hayden, a conservation officer with the Connecticut Department of Environmental Protection. Mary and George made a vibrant, loving family life for their daughters in an historic 1875 house in Niantic, Connecticut. The home was full of music, laughter, the smell of Mary’s incredible cooking, and the constant chatter of visitors. Their doors were always open, and friends and family would often stay for days. If someone needed support, they were invited to stay for months on end.
Mary poured her boundless energy and creativity into everything she did, whether it be lending her beautiful voice to the church choir, building sets and sewing costumes for the kids’ school plays, or working with George to renovate their home, a project which went on for more than 50 years. She and George were happily married until his passing in 2015.
In 2019, Mary moved to Rye, to live with her daughter and son-in-law. In Rye, she made quite a few new friends who were always very kind and loving to her. She especially loved her “favorite restaurant in the world” Kelly’s Sea Level where she was treated with great warmth and attention by the staff and locals alike. She adored her newly adopted hometown.
Mary is survived by her daughters Jeannie Hayden and her husband Gary Greenberg of Los Angeles, California, and Leigh Hayden-Tuneski and her husband Peter Tuneski of Rye; as well as her grandchildren Madeline Greenberg, Prescott Tuneski, and Tess Tuneski. Mary also has numerous cousins and extended family both in the U.S. and Ireland.
Mary will always be remembered for her open heart, her inner strength, and her irreverent sense of humor. Though we cannot put into words how much we’ll miss Mary Hayden, there is no doubt that her generosity of spirit will live on within all of us who were blessed to know and love her.
A memorial mass will be held at St. Agnes Catholic Church in Niantic on Oct. 25 at 11 a.m. In lieu of flowers, please donate to Goodspeed Musicals, plant a tree through legacy.com, or give a compliment to a complete stranger.