Rye Mom Steps Back from Official Duties

 

Some of the duties a Rye mom has announced she will be cutting back on include: driving people to and from places; driving to four different grocery stores to find ‘acceptable’ brands; cooking; failing to cook things people find agreeable; refereeing; reminding people not to touch other people; reminding people that only mom can use that word, reminding people to shower; reviewing the definition of personal space; laundry; conducting search and rescue missions for wayward socks, shoes, hoodies, underwear; reviewing the definition of hamper; expecting sentences; deciphering grunts; asking people to feed and walk dogs then feeding and walking dogs; asking people to load the dishwasher then loading the dishwasher; asking people to flush toilets then flushing toilets; interfacing with educators, speech, occupational, and behavior therapists and all manner of medical professionals; apologizing to everyone for lack of follow through on all fronts; and wondering how this all happened 26 times a day.

 

Attendance at games, concerts, parent-teacher and IEP meetings will be considered on a case-by-case basis — weather will most certainly play a factor.

 

She will divide her time between North America and a beach.

 

(Members of the household have issued a statement indicating that they are royally hungry and wondering what’s for dinner.)

 

• Eileen O’Connor